A Life in Flux

Monday Morning:

Ever have one of those days when you know you are supposed to be doing something but don't know what it is. That is how I felt when I woke up this morning.

I just got back from a relaxing week at the beach. I actually unplugged from my computer for over 30 hours - that's right no Twitter or Facebook - and while it was great I think it threw me out of balance.

This is one of the first Mondays when I have nothing on the calendar for the day. Sunday is when I try to plan for the week but I was recovering last night. So now I am schedule-less. And I am not a schedule-less kinda girl.

I should tell you that I am currently unemployed - and no job equals no schedule, something I have yet to get used to, which is why every Sunday I sit back and try and make some kind of plan for the week so I don't end up with mornings like this where I have no idea what I should or could be doing. I NEED structure.

A Little Back Story:

 I was laid off initially back in July of 2009. I was probably the happiest unemployed girl out there. I decided to take some time off to "find" myself but ended up working through Thanksgiving thanks to several industrious staffing services I was using. I ended up with the holidays off before going back to work in April for what I hoped was a permanent job. Alas it did not work out that way, and I found myself unemployed again that August. 

So I am back to finding myself - but I don't have much time. The state of Texas doesn't really care about my existential dilemmas, they are tired of supporting me and want me to suck it up and just accept mediocrity ( aka - a job)

Conclusion(?):

So you see my problem. I have things that need to get done but without structure and schedules I often just feel overwhelmed.

I could be job hunting. I am registered with eight staffing services but rarely contact them because they might have finally found a job for me - and that kinda frightens me. I do not want to accept mediocrity - I want to believe that I am better than that, that I am strong and creative.

Do I pursue a new found passion ( social media) , do I suck it up, should I email the staffing services and tell them I am available for work, do I reach out to my network for help ( um should mention my almost crippling fear of speaking here)?

All the forks in the road are open to me and at times the direction I should take seems so obvious.

So maybe today I'll contact the staffing services and my networks - but I need a schedule first.

The First Blog

I have to be honest, it never occurred to me to ever blog,  I didn't even keep a diary as a kid. I have spent the last 15 years in the finance industry, so while overly familiar with numbers and equations, I am less so with words. That and you really can't have someone "proof" your blog - something I do whenever I have to actually write anything over one paragraph. But after being laid off in July of 2009 I became addicted to Facebook. At first it was just to keep track of my friends who had jobs - and lives -  and then family. But soon I realized it could do much more. I friended business I frequented, bands I liked and other local organizations - and I got REWARDED for it. Imagine that. I found out about free events and discounts available to Facebook users only. It was like crack. But it also got me out of the house. And then I found out - I had FOLLOWERS - no really - I had friends who deliberately went to my post because I was doing interesting things! In third grade the teacher had to tell the kids to play with me and now I had followers. Several friends thought I should write a blog about the free and cheap stuff to do in Austin - so this is it  - sort of. Because there is more to me than being cheap. I hope.